You've probably heard that old joke, "Why are you beating your head against the wall?" "Because it feels so good when I stop." Or words to that effect. I made a Big D. yesterday, to stop beating my head against the match.com wall. I decided that I'm done dating for awhile, maybe a long while.
Just prior to making that decision, I had made contact with one other guy. So I wrote to him and said only that I'd had a short relationship that didn't work out, but I was hurting, and not good date material right now. In spite of that, he continued to correspond with me, and finally talked me into meeting later this week.
He seems nice, but I can't fathom why anyone would want to go out with me right now. I didn't go into specifics, but was very clear about not having much enthusiasm for dating now, and I didn't want to waste his time. He must be a glutton for punishment, or an opportunist. I'm not sure what to think.
I'm still convinced that J. was The One, despite plenty of evidence to the contrary. I'm afraid that I'm always going to think of him as "the one that got away." And even if I do get over it at some point, I'll always regret the way it ended. And how I always seem to bungle a good thing because of my impatience and immaturity.
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